Our story from start to finish. Warning- it’s pretty damn detailed:)

March 3rd, 2011: Michael & I spend our first night together, which happens to be the same night he’s back in the states from 8 months in AFG on his first deployment. We had been talking over facebook & then more when he got his phone back on & he wanted to hang out when he got home so I invited him over. We stayed up for hours talking in my living room & then ended up going in my room to watch Sweeney Todd. I was sitting on the edge of my bed taking off my converse & he was kind of half laying behind me. As soon as my second shoe hit the floor he reached around, grabbing me by the waist & pulled me against him & wouldn’t let go. My stomach was turning knots. I hadn’t seen him in about 2 years & even when I knew him before he was a casual acquaintance from parties & school but the chemistry that night was undeniable. We just, clicked. Anyways, I didn’t really know what to do for a minute so I thought for a minute & didn’t even move & then I looked up at him & his face was so close to mine I acted on instinct & kissed him. I swear there were fireworks above our heads lol. He kissed me back & ended up moving his hand from my waist.. up. I thought about stopping him, this wasn’t like me but it didn’t stay in my mind for long. Everything felt so, right with him. Our first night ended in the best sex of my life, I’m not even kidding. He ended up leaving at about 2:30 in the morning but before he left he took off his St. Christopher/USMC necklace & put it on me. He told me that he wore in every day all day while he was overseas & it kept him safe so now it would keep me safe:) Regardless, I was still nervous that I wouldn’t hear from him again any time soon. But the very next day he texted me saying that he hoped I was thinking about him cuz he couldn’t stop thinking about me:) He came back over that day & we spent a day at the mall where he made me a Marine monkey in jungle cammies at the Build-A-Bear workshop<3 His name is Jake & he smells just like Michael & I can’t sleep without him. (Mostly cuz I miss cuddling with Michael so much)

April 4th, 2011: We had been dating for a month now & by dating I mean going out on dates & spending near everyday together but we weren’t “official” yet. On the night of the 4th he was down in Texas visiting some friends before he had to go back to Pendleton & he kept texting me telling me how much he missed me & wanted me there with him & how he could see us going really far. I reminded him that we had both just gotten out of pretty serious relationships a few months prior & we had both been cheated on & fucked over & that even though I really cared about him & knew I was ready to be with him I wanted him to be 100% sure too. He said the right words. “I want to be with you.” I said “So this makes me your girl?” And he just said “Yep:)” I ran & jumped on my sisters bed like a little kid & told her right away:) We spent some time together at some point every month after, whether it was me going down to Cali for a few days or Michael coming home, I got pretty spoiled seeing him every single month, even if it was only for a matter of days. We fell head over heels in love & our relationship progressed at near impossible speeds & he ended up telling me that he wanted to marry me & informed me that I needed to start planning a wedding. Almost every day we talked about getting married & he told me that he couldn’t wait to make me his wife & have me down there for good cuz he couldn’t stand the way the distance made him feel. But then came August.

August: The problems started early to mid-August. We were arguing over the phone weekly, several times a week admittedly, & we hadn’t seen each other in a month & knew we wouldn’t see each other till the end of September. The day of my mother’s annual luau & the day I was leaving to Seattle for Hempfest he called me & broke up with me at about 8:30 in the morning. I was crushed. I spent the next 48 hours getting drunk & stoned off my ass trying to forget. He deleted me off facebook & stopped speaking with me for about a week. His dad showed up to pick up some of Michael’s things & he stayed & talked & cried in front of me. I called Michael that day & told him what he did was unfair to his dad. He acted like he didn’t even care. A few days later he hit me up & asked how I was doing. I wasn’t doing well at all but I tried to act like I was. I did tell him that I missed him though. He said he missed me too & then started talking about how we may or may not work things out but he’ll always care about me no matter what & for me to not count out the possibility of us getting back together, he seemed to really stress that. Well that night my sister Sidney came over & told me that she saw him talking to this girl on facebook about how he surprised her with tickets to a hockey game & she was like “omg thanks babe.” and “last night was awesome babe! u truly are amazing!” I literally dropped to my knees & sobbed like someone had just fucking died. I assumed the worst & I texted him: “Haha wow you are the world’s biggest piece of shit. Don’t ever fucking speak to me again. Fuck you.” All he texted back was “Um ok…….” I didn’t even reply. It was the last thing I said to him.

September: A month had passed & I still was crying the majority of days spent in my room, staying stoned all day long or going to the river & laying in the sun smoking joints & drinking beer. At nights I would get even more stoned followed by getting drunk as fuck. I thought about him 24/7 & I hated myself for it. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse my dog of 11 years, my baby girl that I had raised, died. It was the day before Michael’s birthday when she passed. I ended up having a full blown panic attack, the stress was too much. I ended up burying her that night in my mom’s back yard & a few days later I planted a plum tree I bought in the same place. I had never been so miserable. And I knew Michael was coming home on leave for a few weeks shortly after his birthday & I had managed to resist lighting some clothes of his on fire, so I texted him telling him to come get the rest of his shit. He hit me up on a night when I was babysitting my niece at home all alone & I was rocking her to sleep. I didn’t think it was the smartest thing to let him come over when I was alone so I just decided I wouldn’t let him in the house. I let him know I had to put Shiloh to bed & then he could come get his things. After she was asleep I sat there getting stoned as fuck, knowing I wouldn’t be able to handle the situation sober. When he came over I went outside, handed him his things & when I looked in his eyes I couldn’t think of anything to say so I just said “see ya” & turned around & went in the house. About 10 minutes later my phone went off with a text & I knew it was him before I even looked at it. It said “I’m sorry Jen, I know I’m the world’s biggest asshole & there’s nothing I can do to show how sorry I am. Just know that I’ll always love you no matter what.” I replied “come back here.” He said he couldn’t bring himself to come back (turns out he was only parked down the street lol) so I said “Your words don’t mean shit if your actions don’t match it. If you mean what you said then you can say it to my face. You owe me that much. You don’t even have to come in if you don’t want.” About 15 minutes later he was back outside. I told him that I got it, that he chose convenience. He stared at me like I was crazy & said “That’s what you think? Jen, I missed you so much it made my gut hurt & it was killing me to be apart from you every day. I didn’t think I could hack it any longer. But then when you told me to never speak to again, I realized how much I fucked up & how much more it hurt that way.” I just hugged him at that point. I couldn’t think of any words that could express what I was feeling. He squeezed me back & kissed the top of my head. I looked up at him & asked if I could kiss him. He put his lips inches from mine & nodded. I almost cried at how much I had missed that feeling. I asked if he wanted to come inside & he said “Do you think that’s a good idea?” I just nodded. He stayed with me until 3am doing the same thing we had done the first night only this time it was 4 hours straight. I shit you not. Lol. We spent the next 3 nights in hotel rooms together because we didn’t want our families to judge & then on his last night here he asked if I wanted to make the drive back down to Camp Pendleton with him. A 2 day roadtrip with the man I love more than life itself? Of course I said yes!! I told my family I was flying down to visit 2 friends of mine & we left. The 2 days we spent on the road together was fucking magical. We talked so in depth about ever last detail of what went wrong, what we should fix, what we did afterwards, how we felt about our future. I spent the most wonderful 6 days of my life in Marine Corps barracks with him;) I flew back home & about a week later I informed my family that he & I were working things out. We both got a taste of the single life (we both rebounded with one other person one other time, go figure) & turns out, he had been staying drunk the majority of the time as well, trying to block it all out. We both realized how much life sucked without the other one & we were able to talk about everything there was to clear out & at the end of it all we still wanted to be with the other one. But we needed to make sure it was right, & not just that excitement of being back in each other lives.

October 28th, 2011: I landed the job I’d been dying to get at the restaurant I had applied to (my other option was Arby’s:/) And later that day Michael called me & we talked about some really important shit & ended up deciding to “officially” get back together. Seriously, that was such an epic day:) So now here I sit, all of that off my chest & a proud Marine girlfriend to the man of my dreams who gets to see her sexy piece of man candy for a 96 on Thanksgiving & then again for Christmas & New Years when we can have our first New Years kiss!! I am so thankful for him with all my heart, he’s my best friend & I’ll never stop working at this relationship, he’s amazing <3

December 30th: We were laying on my couch talking about the future & he asked me to marry him. He didn’t get on one knee, he didn’t have a ring but he looked me in the eye and said “Let’s get married.” 2 nights later we decided that in mid-February I’ll fly to Cali & we’ll go to the courthouse & just fucking do it:) So as of next month I will be Jennifer Bolinger :)